August 23: Speak Life Over Your Children

 Speak Life Over Your Children

Dr. Terry Ann Robinson
Kings SDA Church

Proverbs 18:21 The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.

Have you heard the saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?” Maybe as a child, you recited this after a heated argument developed between you and your friends, where some harsh words were tossed in your direction. Then you may have tried hard to convince yourself that this saying is true. I know I did. When the words were so painful, I recited the saying, then walked off, hid in a corner, and cried from the pain that came from those very words that may not have broken my bones but surely broke my little heart. 

The influence of words is highly underestimated.

Some years ago, a young lady walked into my classroom. I had seen her around campus, but we had never spoken. She introduced herself and said she wanted to speak with me. She explained that in her mind was a battle she could not get over. Her mother could not read. The student was in year 9 and was also struggling with reading. She explained that she wanted to do well in school, but her mother had been telling her that, just like her, she would never be able to read. The words of the mother were deeply affecting this child, who wanted to push past the barriers of generational challenges. 

We talked for a while, and I gave her some recommendations to improve her literacy. I also encouraged her to read the book “Think Big” by Ben Carson. 

That day, I decided to speak life into that child. I got the book and gave it to her. I made regular check-ins to see what she had read and what she understood from the text. Whenever I met her in the corridor, I intentionally stopped and spoke a positive word to her. I also got her some additional help in her subject areas. 

That child left high school with seven (7) subjects.

It is so easy to speak negatively to our children. Sometimes the words unconsciously come from us, especially in moments when we are correcting an inappropriate behavior or when our child does something that gets us upset. 

The bible is very clear about the impact of our words.

Proverbs 12:18, “There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”

Proverbs 15:4, “A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.”

Proverbs 15:2, “The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly.”

Proverbs 25:11, "A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver."

It is not easy to always speak a positive word. Psalm 141:3 tells us to set a guard over our mouth and to ask the Lord to keep watch over the door of our lips. 

What does that look like? 

Sometimes it means swallowing what was about to come out of your mouth. Sometimes it means catching yourself in the middle of a sentence, stopping right there, and making a U-turn with your speech. Sometimes it means being silent and delaying your words until after you have prayed and God has given you instructions to speak again. 

I encourage you today from Colossians 4:6, "Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt." Speak life over your children. When it matters the most, the words you say will come back to them. 

Prayer

Our Father, You said in Your words that life and death are in the power of the tongue. Please help us to speak words of truth, words of wisdom, words of life over our children. When the things we are about to speak will cause more harm than good, remind us to keep quiet or take a U-turn with our speech. We know that there are enough negative words being tossed around our children daily. Please help us to be that positive voice. In your name we pray. Amen.