September 23: Come Close

Sis. Ava Thomas

Theme: The Gift of Acceptance

Scripture

James4:8

“Key Text: “Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.”

Have you ever felt like you couldn’t face God in prayer because of your sin?

You wrestle within yourself, convinced that He won’t answer, that He doesn’t want to see you because your sin is so great it feels beyond forgiveness. You wonder, How did I get here—so ashamed, so unworthy—that the only prayer you can whisper is “Please forgive me”? Even then, you doubt if you’re worthy to receive it.

It’s not that I hadn’t heard about God’s love. My spiritual leaders would often remind me: God’s grace is sufficient. But in my heart, my biggest struggle was accepting that truth for myself. I couldn’t move past my guilt long enough to believe I was worthy to be saved and loved.

Then, during a Bible study on Genesis, I encountered the story of Tamar in Genesis 38. Tamar’s unconventional and scandalous story shows God working through unexpected and imperfect circumstances. And in Matthew 1:3, we see that Tamar’s name appears in the lineage of Jesus—alongside Gentiles, widows, and those considered socially marginalized.

Through Tamar’s story, I began to see how gracious our Savior truly is. If God could redeem her story, I could go to Him boldly and confidently with mine.

On April 15, 2025, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Not once did I ask God, Why me? I simply accepted that this is the journey He appointed for me. At first, I told only a select few about my illness. Then my “other mother,” Mrs. Darlene Green, shared James 5:14–15 with me:

“Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. If they have sinned, they will be forgiven.”

From that moment, I realized my journey wasn’t meant to be walked in isolation. God was inviting me to embrace and be embraced by as many people as possible.

When you’re sick, you long for a sense of normalcy—something to hold onto when so much feels out of your control. You try to avoid the stares, the silent questions, the unmistakable looks that say, “They know.” You want to protect your privacy and dignity as you’re already fighting so hard.

I’ve had surgery and am now in treatment. Along the way, I’ve met incredible people. My family has been my rock, my church family has been my faith anchor, caregivers and prayer partners have stood by me, and even short texts and quiet visits have reminded me that I’m not alone.

I’ve asked God to hold my hand many times—and now, I ask boldly. I pray earnestly without fear of being shunned. I’ve drawn courage to draw near to God from strong women in Scripture—Tamar, Rahab, Ruth, Bathsheba—women whose stories prove that God redeems and uses those the world may overlook.

Like Paul, I can pray for healing and still rest in God’s answer:

“Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’” (2 Corinthians 12:7–10)

Even if healing doesn’t come instantly, His strength is with me. I believe with all my soul that God has been gracious to me, and I am walking—step by step—on my healing journey.

Prayer:

Lord, I come to You as I am—imperfect and in need of Your mercy. By Jesus’ blood, I approach Your throne boldly, trusting in Your grace and forgiveness. Amen.