Turn Up the Heat – Fanning the Flames of Love

Turn Up the Heat – Fanning the Flames of Love

Scripture: “Therefore I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you…” – 2 Timothy 1:6

By Sharon Campbell Danvers |
Founder Daughters Arise Ministries

Growing up, I was accustomed to cooking on wood fire. Sometimes I had to add extra wood to keep the flames burning. Other times, I had to bend low and fan the fire to build it back up again. Left on its own, the fire would eventually die out, leaving only smoke and ashes. It was constant work, but the reward was warmth and food that satisfied.

In the same way, the fire in our relationships will not keep burning on its own. Intimacy—whether spiritual, emotional, or physical—takes intentional effort. Love is a fire that needs tending. If we do not feed it, if we do not fan it, if we do not protect it, it will grow dim. The early sparks of romance and connection are wonderful, but without constant care, those sparks fade.

When the flames are going dim in our marriages, we must make the choice to turn up the heat again. This means adding fuel and creating space for closeness. It means fanning the flames of openness, honesty, and communication. It means turning up the warmth of affection and tenderness. It means maintaining the “temperature” of the bedroom with intentional intimacy. Just as fire requires wood, oxygen, and attention, love requires time, effort, and consistent investment.

Paul’s encouragement to Timothy was to fan into flame the gift of God. That same principle applies in marriage. We cannot live on yesterday’s fire. We must continually breathe life into our covenant, rekindling passion and renewing our commitment.

Ways to Turn Up the Heat in Marriage

1. Fan the flame of love – Speak words of affirmation and kindness daily.

2. Fan the flame of openness – Be honest about your feelings, needs, and desires.

3. Turn up the light of togetherness – Spend quality time together, not just doing chores but enjoying each other.

4. Maintain the bedroom temperature – Guard intimacy as a holy gift. Do not let busyness or neglect steal it away.

5. Add fuel often – Surprise one another with gestures of love, forgiveness, and thoughtfulness.

A fire left alone dies out. But a fire that is tended, fed, and fanned grows into a steady, lasting flame that warms everything around it. The same is true for marriage. Do not let your relationship smolder into ashes. Choose instead to turn up the heat, fan the flames, and let your love burn bright.

Reflection Questions

1. Am I actively fanning the flames of love in my marriage, or am I expecting the fire to burn on its own?

2. Which area—spiritual, emotional, or physical intimacy—needs fresh fuel in my relationship?

3. What is one intentional act I can do this week to turn up the heat in my relationship?

Prayer:

Lord, thank You for the gift of love and intimacy in marriage. Help us not to neglect the fire You have entrusted to us. Teach us to add fuel with kindness, forgiveness, and affection. Show us how to fan the flames when they grow dim, and give us the wisdom to keep our love burning brightly through every season. Amen.